Monday, December 18, 2006

courtesy of the woman i love

Well maybe you should just drink a lot less coffee,
And never ever watch the ten o'clock news,
Maybe you should kiss someone nice,
Or lick a rock,
Or both.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Thursday, December 07, 2006

in other words,

So newspapers aren't dying; they're just undergoing an identity crisis. They don't know who they want to be.

Put even a fool in front of a window and you'll get a Spinoza.


After a couple of drinks in John Jay, my floormates shed their clothing, swaddled themselves in blankets, started crying, and watched Arrested Development. I'm not sure what lesson this taught me, other than that first-time drunks are both sweetly naïve ("Wow, I can't believe they didn't even search our bags when we came into John Jay!") and hilarious.


[This headline has been deleted.]


She seemed sometimes so sensitive that whole decades hurt her feelings, and the prose on the page suggested Valery's "shiverings of an effaced leaf," as if her next trick might be evaporation.


Friday, December 01, 2006

it made me miss my new york nothing

sometime in the past two weeks i snapped back to life and thank god because the what-does-it-all-mean-and-what's-the-point-of-it-all was getting a bit old and quite frankly, even too cliche for me. it's spring in new york. or late summer, and it feels like i'm getting to know everyone all over again like you do every early september. or maybe it's just stage two. i want to write a happy novemember ninth (eighth? seventh?) birthday letter explaining it all, everything, the silence and the neglect and the cold heart, because honesty would be the only and best present i could send, but it hasn't happened. i haven't had time? it seems like such a fantasy now. everything keeps going even if you decide you don't want to grow another day older. they're going to prague and oxford and becoming real people at foreign affairs and i like how real it is. are you really wearing makeup? i'm never going to stop wishing i could still write in my livejournal because THIS IS WHAT I THINK LIKE. sorry. graceful and funny. not fair.
"this is a great wall."

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

thankful for

gmail chat
anthony from housing
strokos pizza
my suitemates
oreo bars from blue java
spec seniors
nyu and georgetown
milan kundera
renovated ruggles housing
the oc without marissa
professor picatto
the spec elevator
gael garcia bernal
jstor
tivo

ruggles snuggles emails
dancing made possible by drunkenness
my ipod voice recorder
j.d., for letting me turn my columns in way too late
my bro
neha's awesomeness
wyatt's cooking
naim's comments
ryan's hugs
rudi's compliments
andrew's ridiculousness
tom's texts
ramen noodles
new york times news tracker email alerts
the second nook room in 303
"in today's spectator" emails that get sent out around 3am and remind me that it's 3am
newsweeklies

bad photography, good voice


Saturday, November 18, 2006

times book review

On "Up is Up but So is Down: New York's Downtown Literary Scene, 1974-1992"
Does downtown still exist--and does it matter? The quick answer to the first question is no...As little kids in New York in the 1980s, my brother and I were scared (I blush to remember) of punks' metallic studs and mohawks; its hard to imagine first graders being terrified of a hipster in a trucker cap and expensive jeans. Today, the city is so expensive that the real Bohemians are dispersed among disparate, far flung neighborhoods.

But maybe that's not so tragic. After all, the third factor in the disappearance of Downtown is the Internet...If there is to be a new downtown, it is probably taking shape in a city like Portland, Ore., out among the fresh pine trees, and those of us in New York can visit it online.

From a brief about most-stolen books:

He added, interestingly, that the engimatic novels of the Japanese writer Haruki Murakami have begin to disappear at a fast clip. His explanation: "In his own way, Murakami is a subversive writer with an outlaw sensibility. His characters have this everyman thing going on, but they are also working against the grain."


Friday, November 17, 2006

how does it feel?

like a rolling stone, duh.

except nevermind because that's part of the question.

so bob dylan live, some arena in new jersey: not even squinting could i see mr. bob fucking dylan, THE man, because he was wearing black and i lost my glasses weeks ago but i could hear and feel his harmonica and could pick him out because his hat would move whenever he approached the microphone. most unhip concert of my life, ironically made even more unhip by the fact that i'm not hip enough to know bob dylan's extensive catalog, but it still made it monumental that i got to sit down and have him, THE man, rock me into a meditative sleep that would be interrupted every time a song ended and the audience clapped because i was with them and with him all along, except my eyes were closed and my mind was rocking out without knowing it.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

the sporting life.








scarf and tshirt evenings in november

ridiculous.
I am going to major in History and English.

hilarious.










amazing.
Spring 2007
CGTH GLOBALIZATION, Joseph Stiglitz
ENGL FOUNDATIONS OF AMERICAN LITERATURE II, Amanda Claybaugh
HIST EUROPEAN HISTORY SINCE 1789, Lisa Tiersten
HIST LATIN AMERICAN CIVILIZATN II, Joseph Moya
HIST HISTORY OF THE MODERN MIDDLE EAST, Rashid Khalidi
CPLS INTRO TO COMPARATIVE LITERATURE AND SOCIETY, Andreas Hyussen


Saturday, October 14, 2006

This probably belongs on livejournal

So I figure that my absence from this little blogspot has been long enough that no one checks this link anymore. Sweet.

So sophomore year of college started a quite long time ago--so long ago in fact that I have a hard time remembering life without ruggles snuggles and karen barkey and my new regina spektor cd. and tivo. can't forget tivo. I already have midterms and only right now am I starting to snap back into life, into my sophomore self.

I have no idea who I am.

I would like to think that I'm pretty badass because I don't sleep at nights. But I sleep all day, so it doesn't count in the slightest bit.

I listen to the same ten songs more than obsessively. I want to be Sofia Coppola. I've run out of places to use Jonathan Safran Foer allusions in the name of. I'm single and I knew this would happen. I turned 19 and they threw me a party and I only remember the feelings.

Friday, August 11, 2006

I'm free!

Yesterday I went to a "town hall" style meeting that Rick Stengel, new editor of Time magazine was holding for his whole staff on the future of the magazine. It made me all jumpy and absurdly lucky to be here. He kept emphasizing that the role of Time is to "explain" and "analyze" the world and to help people understand it. It sounds gross and patronizing, but its such a noble goal if done right...I love it.

I emailed him after the meeting and told him what I had thought, why I've always been a Time-obsesee and gave him my feedback on what the more aware younger reader wants from the magazine. And he wrote me back. and he said "I wish they were a whole lot more like you out there. Thanks for your nice note. And, by the way, we usually take our interns after their junior year, so apply again next summer!"

Sick.

I thought that nothing could top that on my last day at Time Inc, until I opened my crisp new free issue of People magazine ("Before They Were Stars") from the lobby and had the pleasure to see this at nine in the morning.

Admire, drool:



Mmmmm.

Viva La NON-Revolucion

OMFG

Way to go, NYT Op-Ed Section:

Op-Ed Contributor
Recounting Our Way to Democracy
Published: August 11, 2006

Mexico City

NOT since 1910, when another controversial election sparked a revolution, has Mexico been so fraught with political tension.

The largest demonstrations in our history are daily proof that millions of Mexicans want a full accounting of last month’s presidential election. My opponent, Felipe Calderón, currently holds a razor-thin lead of 243,000 votes out of 41 million cast, but Mexicans are still waiting for a president to be declared.

Unfortunately, the electoral tribunal responsible for ratifying the election results thwarted the wishes of many Mexicans and refused to approve a nationwide recount. Instead, their narrow ruling last Saturday allows for ballot boxes in only about 9 percent of polling places to be opened and reviewed.

This is simply insufficient for a national election where the margin was less than one percentage point — and where the tribunal itself acknowledged evidence of arithmetic mistakes and fraud, noting that there were errors at nearly 12,000 polling stations in 26 states.

It’s worth reviewing the history of this election. For months, voters were subjected to a campaign of fear. President Vicente Fox, who backed Mr. Calderón, told Mexicans to change the rider, but not the horse — a clear rebuke to the social policies to help the poor and disenfranchised that were at the heart of my campaign. Business groups spent millions of dollars in television and radio advertising that warned of an economic crisis were I to win.

It’s my contention that government programs were directed toward key states in the hope of garnering votes for Mr. Calderón. The United Nations Development Program went so far as to warn that such actions could improperly influence voters. Where support for my coalition was strong, applicants for government assistance were reportedly required to surrender their voter registration cards, thereby leaving them disenfranchised.

And then came the election. Final pre-election polls showed my coalition in the lead or tied with Mr. Calderón’s National Action Party. I believe that on election day there was direct manipulation of votes and tally sheets. Irregularities were apparent in tens of thousands of tally sheets. Without a crystal-clear recount, Mexico will have a president who lacks the moral authority to govern.

Public opinion backs this diagnosis. Polls show that at least a third of Mexican voters believe the election was fraudulent and nearly half support a full recount.

And yet the electoral tribunal has ordered an inexplicably restrictive recount. This defies comprehension, for if tally sheet alterations were widespread, the outcome could change with a handful of votes per station.

Our tribunals — unlike those in the United States — have been traditionally subordinated to political power. Mexico has a history of corrupt elections where the will of the people has been subverted by the wealthy and powerful. Grievances have now accumulated in the national consciousness, and this time we are not walking away from the problem. The citizens gathered with me in peaceful protest in the Zócalo, the capital’s grand central plaza, speak loudly and clearly: Enough is enough.

In the spirit of Gandhi and the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., we seek to make our voices heard. We lack millions for advertising to make our case. We can only communicate our demand to count all the votes by peaceful protest.

After all, our aim is to strengthen, not damage, Mexico’s institutions, to force them to adopt greater transparency. Mexico’s credibility in the world will only increase if we clarify the results of this election.

We need the goodwill and support of those in the international community with a personal, philosophical or commercial interest in Mexico to encourage it to do the right thing and allow a full recount that will show, once and for all, that democracy is alive and well in this republic.

Andrés Manuel López Obrador, the mayor of Mexico City from 2001 to 2005, was a candidate for president in 2006, representing a coalition led by his Party of the Democratic Revolution. This article was translated from the Spanish by Rogelio Ramírez de la O.



Un. fucking. believable.


Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Thank God Its Colder in Chicago


As much as I hate their re-design and the fact that their asshole factor quadrupled once it went into effect and they fired jesse oxfeld, I can't help but love Gawker. Especially when it does their own take on NYT stories, like this.

Also, I love how with my recent obsession with impersonal "blogging", i'm avoiding my feelings and daily life and such. I'm never going to be able to write a memoir.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

The most beautiful museum in the world, etc etc


I'm back from mexico city. Ramblings on life, death, mi abuelita, and wearing heels to a funeral TK. Yup, that's right, I use ridiculous print journalism terms now.

*TK= newspaper speak for to come. How "K" means come, I have no idea. But it feels good to know it anyway.


sick picture of the guggenheim from flickr, by some gothamist guy, via gakwer. who can keep track of this stuff anymore?

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Baghdad: the City of a Million Ways To Die

Do Americans really know what the hell is going on in Iraq? Because I don't. Or I didn't.
I obviously still don't have much of a clue, but I read an article today that made me really worried, particularly about how or why information is discussed about the war in our world here.

I read news pieces on Iraq, and then I'll read very passionate or very intellectual op-eds or blog entries, but I never feel like I get them because they either assume I already know everything, which I don't, or they just write as if no one did, really.

Regardless, I read a piece in the new GQ with the horrible Justin Timberlake cover today, and it all finally clicked. And I really highly recommend it. It's by JEffrey Getleman, a writer from the New York Times Baghdad Bureau. I would link it but it's not online.

Wow, how ridiculous am I? "all i needed to know about iraq i read in gq"

no, but really.

...my grandma just spoke coherently after a month of not making a sound...

...i'm off for the wekend to go see jos at his genius camp!

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Inspired by true events on movie screens

So, New York, like the rest of the universe, just had a massive heat wave. That also means life suddenly got super uber gnarly crazy and made people do crazy things, like pick my name out of a hat and give me my first real journalism assignment, or listen to the only three guster tracks on guster dot com on repeat for an entire work day (they're in the Bonus section on the top right). People loved talking about it.

When it ended, my mom and I were carrying the last remains of our life on 19th street out of the street elevator, it started pouring all of a sudden. After three days of 100+ weather. Naturally. It was heavy, movie set rain, and it felt fitting.

Then Lea Geyser and I shopped at Marc Jacobs. Um, what? as she said on her blog, I mean...livejournal, "THE IRONY OF THIS KILLS ME, BUT I WON'T MAKE JOKES"

Then I joined my first and only facebook global group, ever. That's because I'm pretty sure it can't be beat. Buca really does love us.

Then I got an assignment for a story in the New York Post. That's a real newspaper! in new york! and i get a byline! and 75 cents a word! !?!$(#). Today my editor e-mailed me something and this was at the end of the message:
This message and its attachments may contain legally privileged
and/or confidential information. If you are not the intended
recipient (or responsible for delivery of the message to the
intended recipient), you are hereby notified that you have received
this transmission in error; any review, dissemination, distribution
or copying of this transmission is strictly prohibited. If you have
received this communication in error, please notify us immediately
by reply or by telephone (call us at 212-930-8000) and immediately delete this message and all its attachments. Any content of this message and its attachments that does not relate to the official business of NYP Holdings, Inc. must be taken not to have been sentor endorsed by any of them.
Gnarly much?


Hmmmm what other craziness happened? Oh, I found the perfect shampoo for my weak, out of control, terribly damaged hair. A beauty product that actually works and actually makes your hair un-damaged is pretty much a miracle. You think I'm kidding...

Global Warming = Al Gore madness = Marc Jacobs T Shirt = Lea and I on Bleeker
Global Warming = Movie set rain = closure on final move out day
Global Warming = delirium = joining a facebook global group
Global Warming = alternate forces of the universe collide to make fern happy = nypost story

Thanks global warming?

...Anyway this in no way means I'm not scared out of my mind about doing this article.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

I think a little part of me just died.

Monday, July 17, 2006

what a sad day for keith-lovers worldwide


ohmygosh (scroll down)

So remember how I said the strangely beautiful Keith from project runway was my favorite? And then kyle and justin called him an ass? and then justin said he looked like robby cannady from our tenth grade english class, one robby cannady whom i happened to harbor a huge crush for until he turned melissa and i down to be in our hegel project together? well, he is probably an ass, who probably almost certainly copied designs from lacoste and marni for his application. i probably also sound like an ass. but seriously, wtf.

as my awesome co-intern anthony just said to me, "he took our hearts and ran away with them."

Thursday, July 13, 2006

no phantom planet this time

SO, here I am again. Packing. Listening to guster. Wearing my lime green yearbook shirt. Getting ready to move...something, somewhere new, for the third time in a year. Trying to make it meaningful, because it always is.

...being summoned by mom to load the car again and not finishing this entry.

Ah, moving.

=)

...Du Jour

7//13//06


Obsession:
new project runway season, duh. Angela wears these amazing short puffy skirts and Keith is a beautiful man who makes beautiful clothes and they're both my faaaavorites.

Mexico-Us Border Wall Idea that Wants to Treat Immigrants Like Cattle:
watch this rep's convincing how-to video on the wall he wants to build, it's educational and shocking! haha get it?

Blog by a Magazine Editor About a Book : The other day I posted a link to a book review from The New Yorker about "The Long Tail" which I doubt anyone read, eventhough I swore it was interesting. Well, the author of the book who is also the editor of Wired is now keeping a blog to document the phenomenon he writes about in his book: the end of the blockbusters and the best-sellers and the age of niches complements of itunes, amazon, netflix, etc. It's all Malcom-Gladwell-Freakonomics-Tipping-Point-ish, and eventhough I've read neither of them nor this recent addition to that category, I really want to.

Feud that Makes Perfect Sense: wall street journal news vs. wall street journal op-ed. story here, analysis here.

Simile: Ann Coulter Dropped Like Chick-Lit At the End of Summer (from Jossip)


Wednesday, July 12, 2006

My condolences, and digital bubble wrap

To all of you whose computer has crashed because of this "blog": I am sorry. I don't know what the problem is, but I'm sure the people at blogspot support won't email me back, so there's a high chance I still won't know in a while.

Anyone good at code want to see if there's something wrong in an entry that's messing everyone up? This is too much fun and as much as I hate referring to this as my blog, ugh, see, it's gross...I like writing in it. So, hopefully sometime soon it will stop crashing your guys' computers.

Someone let me know if it starts working again ever?

Also, my consolation gift to all of you for having messed with your firefox: BLISSSSSSSSSS

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

...Du Jour

7//11//06

My Hero: this guy, who started with a red paper clip and traded it for stuff all the way until someone gave him a house. no joke.

Boring Facts About Americans:

42% say they're conservative and really are conservative
5% say they're liberal but are actually conservative
13% are genuinely centrist (or perhaps just confused)
13% say they're conservative but are actually liberal
27% say they're liberal and really are liberal from Washington Monthly
"Duh" Breakthrough: The answer to recent trendy question, "Why is it that girls are doing way better in college than they did 30 years ago while boys are treading water?" It's just another reason why girls rule and boys drool: video games.

Worst excuse: Italian guy who got headbutted by Zidane: "I did insult him, it's true," Materazzi said in Tuesday's Gazzetta dello Sport. "But I categorically did not call him a terrorist. I'm not cultured and I don't even know what an Islamic terrorist is."


Awesome Fact About Americans: 90 percent of Americans believe most americans are too fat.

Best
Or Worst
Analysis of Soccer
(and the world)
Ever
(you decide):

America is based on a just and efficient meritocracy that thrives on measured competition. That's why soccer has never really quite caught on here...A culture gets the sport it deserves. While America runs and runs, the rest of the world takes its time and people's lives often change with one critical stroke of luck. In America, we believe in second chances. There's almost always hope that you can catch up in basketball and football. In soccer, you fall behind by two goals and you're pretty much done. Read the rest of the brilliant (sarcasm or truth? you decide) “Why Soccer Sucks” here.


Monday, July 10, 2006

Wouldn't it be funny if the town shared a name with a latin american capital city?

Ha. Ha.

The mayor of a small Bergen County town is calling for a McDonald's boycott if the fast-food chain does not take down a Spanish-language billboard advertising iced coffee.

Bogota Mayor Steve Lonegan said the advertisement is "offensive" and "divisive" because it sends a message that Hispanic im migrants do not need to learn English.

"The true things that bind us together as neighbors and community is our belief in the American flag and our common language," Lonegan said. "And when McDonald's sends a different message, that we're going to be different now, that causes resentment."

Next move: boycotting the town itself.

Friday, July 07, 2006

Bring back compassion and eradicate self interest?

Apparently one of the most brilliant people on earth, Stephen Hawking, thinks we're all royally screwed.

In a June 13 speech in Hong Kong, Hawking said the survival of the human race depends on its ability to find new homes elsewhere in the universe because there's an increasing risk that a disaster will destroy Earth.

He said that if humans can avoid killing themselves in the next 100 years, they should have space settlements that can continue without support from Earth.

This week, he posted this question to humanity on Yahoo Answers:

  • ''In a world that is in chaos politically, socially and environmentally, how can the human race sustain another 100 years?''

I'm still working on grasping sustainable development--now we're already going to have to take on sustainable survival? hopefully we can. at least someone is using apocalyptic terms that don't rely on the tired rhetoric of one specific religion or political or environmental group to draw attention, but that apply to any and all of us because as he says, they are all in chaos, and we all need to stop making excuses for whatever we think is fine, when nothing really is. any takers?

New York Times. HAHA get it?

I have become a strange creature. This morning, before I brushed my teeth, or looked in the mirror, or turned on the lights, I was already on the new york times website. The world is obviously more important than me having to pee or get dressed or be on time to work, right? I've never actually felt this uneasiness that I'm about to describe, but I guess that not being able to wait to read the paper whose print edition is already outside my door by the time I wake up could be attributed to...what? I don't know. Anyway this story (which is really just an anecdote, which is really a recounting of an inconclusive error of memory) needs to go on.

So, I get up today and check the times blah blah and the main story is about the one year anniversary of the London bombings. It took less than a second for me to realize that this meant that today was also the one year anniversary of me moving to New York. Colt took me to the airport really early on the morning of the london bombings and...wow, it's been a whole year since I've lived here, then.

The date never stuck with me, I guess, but I liked the idea that I'd made the indirect realization about the exact twelve months I'd spent here already. As I stared at my computer, I indulged in a bit of flashbacks, and remembered that morning, getting into colt's truck and being a bit emotional about the news and thinking he wouldn't have heard about it yet, since it was so early, but of course he had, his parents think an appropriate time to wake up is like 5 am. I remembered the goodbye in the round entranceway to the san diego airport, and then I got up from the floor (is my laptop ever on a lifted surface?) and got dressed and went to work and didn't have time to read the times because my train ride is super super short so aha.

Fast forward through a half-day at work (i discovered the perfect way to beat rush hour people-traffic--leave work three hours early!) and some paul auster reading and a blog entry whose format i ripped off from best week ever. I want to write about how it's my one year anniversary of moving back to new york. Ok, fern, but first you should check your livejournal to see what you wrote a year ago today.

I started with a year ago yesterday, which held a record of my last day with colt and encinitas.
Dear Fernanda of the Future,

I'm writing this letter to you to make sure you don't forget how delightful this day was. You loved a lot today. Or, perhaps you just realized how fully you did.

...You put on a salmon-pink ruffled chiffon skirt that wasn't really a skirt, but more of a scarf, over your jeans, and put your wet hair up, waiting until you got picked up. He would later tell you you looked very nice today, that...well...i mean, you always do, but today especially. Then you were whisked off by this ruggedly handsome man at your door, wearing what some would consider an offensive tshirt condemning the sanctity of marriage. You held hands while he drove, something you do a lot yet manages to always surprise and comfort you........

...Be Good,

Fernanda of the sixth of July.

Ah, yes, that perfect day. And here I am, reading an entry I actually adressed to my future self, reading it as a full-year future self, meant to serve as a super detailed memory outliner of when you were most in love...ok, sorry. i'm aware this is neat only to me.

Next day:

I began Killing Yourself to Live, Chuck Klosterman's just-released novel(?), at about 6:30pm today.
Three and a half hours later, I finished it.
He puts me in the weirdest mood...
Hm, that's weird. Keep going.
Today was unbelievably difficult.
Ah, yes, there it is. Next line,
Three weeks better damn well go by fast.
Uh.......shit shit shit shit wrong day. wrong one year anniversary. you took colt to the airport, and the big goodbye day on july 6th had taken place because he was going to japan for three weeks the next day. good one.

Turns out in the process of writing this, I've realized the partial truth of my prior realization, but I got to remember the great feeling of july 6. I don't know by how much I was off on the new york year exactly, but I'm not going to check. I'm hoping for another trigger.


If you weren't real, I would make you up.